Signs of Hope

For those of you who know me well, you know that my default outlook is not set to the "Pollyanna" way of viewing life. But for today at least, I am aware of signs of hope.

I am again starting to make plans to travel to Cameroon this summer. This trip was scheduled to happen in January and literally days before leaving was cancelled due to a herniated disc in my back. The road to recovery has been long and tedious, but today it appears as if I will leave June 8th. I have a ticket on hold through my travel agent. My contacts in Cameroon are in the process of composing another letter of invitation so I can apply for a new visa. The insurance company is re-issuing my medical evacuation/repatriation card with the dates of coverage adjusted; Fuller is re-submitting my registration packet. The plans are again becoming concrete and I cannot help but hope.

I walked for two miles today. While a year ago this would have been a rather mundane fact for a long-distance runner like myself, it now symbolizes a milestone in recovery for me. I have not been able to really exercise for months (a crippling fact since exercise serves as one of my coping mechanisms.) Some time ago I got permission to begin walking from my chiropractor and I have been slowly working my way up. The first weeks I would only walk 10 minutes at a time before I began to feel pain; then the next week I could walk for 15 minutes, then 20 and now more than 30. I still can't run but I am grateful for my chance this morning to be out in the fresh air, strolling down the country roads with my headphones set to NPR.

So for now, I bask in the warmth of hope and breathe deeply of its fragrance; next week (or maybe even tomorrow) there will probably be moments where I will need this lingering memory.